A New Tradition: Multi-Generational Bat Mitzvah Cruises

Now Paderson of Easton, Mass., is thinking of celebrating that missing milestone along with her 30 year-old daughter Kim, who didn’t have a bat mitzvah of her own either. “And maybe my mom would come along to make it a three-generation event,” she smiles. “This was a missing part of my life, and others tell me they feel the same way. There’s a need and it fits what I do.”
Paderson, who operates Bar / Bat Mitzvah Vacations, Inc., a division of Smiles and Miles Travel (www.barmitzvahvacations.com), has been arranging other people’s travel plans for over 15 years. (She also plans wedding and anniversary destination trips and cruise vacations.)
While Jewish boys turning 13 have enjoyed ritual Bar Mitzvahs since Biblical times – marking the milestone age of majority — the female version, or Bat Mitzvah, isn’t in the Bible and has only been popular in America for about 50 years. (The first recorded U.S. bat mitzvah occurred in 1922 and was slow to catch on.) In Hebrew, ‘bar’ is son and ‘bat’ is daughter; ‘mitzvah’ translates as ‘covenant.’
Many women – especially Baby Boomers and older – never had the opportunity to become bat mitzvah. In many congregations today, Sabbath services often include bat mitzvah ceremonies for middle-aged women and seniors who missed out earlier.
Ellen Paderson is addressing this missing piece of tradition with ‘Dor L’Dor’ (Hebrew for ‘Generation to Generation’) Bar Mitzvah Cruises. She has arranged with cruise ship companies to accommodate multi-generational bat mitzvahs. These cruises (see accompanying box) include traditional ceremonies led by a cantor or rabbi. She says, “A bat mitzvah cruise is easier to plan than a traditional land-based event, utilizing all that a ship has to offer. The celebration becomes a vacation as well, bringing families together from all over to enjoy the experience. And we handle all the arrangements.”
To prepare students to read selected passages in the original Hebrew from the Torah along with the blessings, some bat mitzvah teachers use Skype (voice over internet technology) to teach students, whether they’re 13 or 90. The bat mitzvah girl(s) and/or lady(ies) help lead the service and address friends and family with a speech related to the Torah (Bible) portion.
For her part, Paderson makes a donation in honor of each bat mitzvah participant to the bat mitzvah person’s chosen charity. Paderson says, “I’m lucky. My work involves creating lifetime memories for people of all ages.”